About The Kid

To begin with, I'd like to take back my comment about the immaturity of Terry and Dan's relationship. Now that I've finished the book and become more used to Dan Savage's writing, I feel like I really understand all of the reasons why he writes the way he does. By the end, I really enjoy his writing and the comedic remarks he has, which is needed at times because of the serious issues he touches upon. Like David Todd, I was not surprised and even a little dissapointed that Dan Savage was offered the deal and then consequently pressured to write the book. I also enjoyed the second half more, as it seemed to become more focused about the baby more than anything else and also really began to form a connection with me.

One of Dan Savage's biggest issues throughout the book is how others think of him and Terry as a gay couple. Especially when they are adopting, he becomes concerned with how Mellissa and Bacchus will see him. It's a very understandable concern, something that everyone involved would naturally think about. The thing that became clear, though, was that everybody involved in the adoption process was so much more concerned about D.J. having "good parents" instead of "straight parents". Ultimately, having good parents is most important and it was touching to see that both Mellissa and Bacchus felt the same way. Although Dan and Terry will always end up having people ask "where is your mother?"to the child, both fathers are irreplaceable.

It was interesting to think that maybe Melissa didn't mind that her child would have two fathers because she had bad experiences with her own mother. I can't imagine my mother ever letting me run away without going crazy and bulldozing a whole city just to find me, no matter how furious she was with me. I feel a little bad for Melissa in this way, and wonder if she ever doubted her own abilities as a mother because of that. She seems to always have had a natural inclination to take care of others; her little brother, her dog and cat, even the David kid for a while. I haven't always gotten along with my mom even though now we have a pretty good relationship, so I wonder what kind of mother I'd be. Would I be a lot like my own mother? I'm afraid I will be, and maybe that will influence my decision about having children in the future. For now, it's too early to tell, but I wonder if that was a part of Melissa's decision, and if it's also something that others think about.

One of my favorite parts of the book is the day when the baby is born. I like this part in particular not because of how "magical"or sentimental one would usually expect it to be. Instead, I like it because it's realistic. Although this day did not seem magical or enlightening in any particular day for Dan, it is still a special part of the book and he is somehow able to relay that, even though he did not feel a bond with the baby yet and even though they weren't jumping all over Melissa crying or laughing. The subtle and calm moments are what seem to somehow make the event special and also very typical of Melissa and her child. In the end of the book, I feel something for Dan Savage and Terry that I had not felt at the beginning. I also do feel like there was something to learn from the book and that it was not just written in desparation of fulfilling a contract. Also, I would love to hear about Terry's side of this story since his personality seems different from Dan's and I would really like to know what it felt like for him throughout these experiences.